I didn’t hate it. I’m kind of surprised and of course I didn’t get what I expected when I thought about how I would feel but actually, I think I can handle this. I’m taking four classes which equals to about 12 units and I was freaking out because of the work load but since 3 of my classes, I knew the teachers and the other one is some lady who is hella chill, I think I won’t jump out of a window. It was really interesting when I compared the groups of people in my classes and the queer classes I have, everyone seemed energetic and happy, and my “straight” class with mostly heteros are all dumpy, stumpy, boring, quiet, stuck up, arrogant, etc. I was thinking to myself, these people are on some major horses but need to get off pronto.

I really, really am in such a better mood when I’m in my queer classes because I feel a sense of safety and harmony where I feel that I can relax and not always be on my guard all the time compared to when I’m in other environments so it was a really nice change to feel calm for a change. I didn’t realize till a while back just how much my “sexuality” effects everything in my life; job, school,friends, life in general, and it feels kind of annoying in a way where you already are a minority in one environment, and top of that you are another minority in a whole other level when it really shouldn’t be so that is what frustrates me the most.

The only thing that I think I will annoy me later on is that I have no days off. I have school everyday but on most days I only have one class for an hour and then I can just go home but it makes me think, damn, “what’s the point of going out for only an hour?” especially when it takes me two hours to get ready, I feel like i have to go somewhere after school so I don’t feel like I’m wasting my makeup or clipper card. I’ve spending a lot of my extra time going to thrift stores honestly because they’re actually really easy for me now. I used to hate hunting for clothes because I need organization  but I learned to make things easier by searching by sections at  a time so if I don’t even have a clue of what I want I just start with what I like, so I’ll start with sweaters and knits, then coats, then skirts, just so I don’t feel super overwhelmed and feel like I have to go through the whole store because it can get really tiring really fast.

I really should be studying or doing homework than shopping because I really don’t want to get lazy again because I love doing nothing and be satisfied with that but I feel that I should learn to adapt to a “work pattern.”

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