I HAVE A LOT OF TIME BUT I FEEL LIKE RUSHING, RUSHING, RUSHING

In my mind, I believe that two things make me up, FASHION AND MALE MODELS. I love fashion to death, TO DEATH!!! I will seriously die for fashion, if I could go to Paris and steal a $16,000 Lanvin dress I would, if I didn’t get caught… ohhhh no not really. :( My other undercover lover, Welll… yessss MALE MODELS, Id die for them two. Seriously though I am obsessed. I HAVE not been able to sleep well in  a long time because I am constantly thinking about my future wanting to be in fashion. I want to be in fashion, no doubt. I daydream all day, when I’m on the bus, by myself, at school, at home, anywhere I am I’m thinking about something  related to fashion.  When I was in High School, instead of doing research in the library or doing classwork, I would be on my ipod or the computer trying  to find new designer looks that I want or discover new male models on my favorite website,

fuckyeahmodelhomme.tumblr.com

Like seriously though, sometimes I catch myself thinking about it soo much, all day long that I don’t pay attention when people are talking to me. When I have  an assignment or a task that I was asked to do, I do it but soooo distracted with images of beautiful clothes, boys, fashion people, glamour, like I realllyyyyyyyyyy want to be in that industry ssoooo badly I feel like I would die if I ended up like the common folk that surrounds me everywhere I go.

I’m about to turn 18 and I don’t know why but I feel that I don’t plan out what I want to do, I feel like I’m wasting my life. I’m already waiting for my new face but after that, what IS MY NEXT STEP????

I’ll have my face, and my dream, but what am I going to do to act on it????

There are so many things that interest me but I don’t know where I would belong, and since I don’t know that , I DONT KNOW WHERE TO Start!!!! I love makeup, fashion, styling, models, magazines, I just don’t know what path to take.

One thing is for sure, I want my career to focus on male models but be able to obtain amazing designer clothes, does that mean I should be a stylist? Should I work at a modeling agency? I feel so lost and confused, and I feel like each passing  day is just wasted if I don’t know what to do with my life.

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